Post by Isiah Zombie on Dec 1, 2007 11:02:28 GMT -8
The Zombie Guy Show
Medical Encounter
Episode: 8
Original Post Date: December 1, 2007
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Isiah Zombie, Monkeysarefunny, and Admiral Donutz are at BB's Shanty watching TV.
Isiah Zombie: Are you still mad about what happened last week?
Monkeysarefunny: Well, you de-modded me... of course it still hurts.
Isiah Zombie: I did it for your own good.
Monkeysarefunny: I'm just tired of you telling me what to do. "No Monkey, you can't post here. No Monkey, you can't use steroids."
Isiah Zombie: It's all over now, and I promise I won't do it again.
Monkeysarefunny: Good.
Ding-Dong..........
Admiral Donutz: Should I answer it?
Isiah Zombie: Go for it.
Admiral Donutz: *gets up and answers door* Hello?
: Increase your mortgage rates up to 15 percent!
Isiah Zombie: Who is it?
Admiral Donutz: *looks back* It's SPAM.
SPAM: Sell your house now! Let me help you sell! This property could practically sell itself!!
Admiral Donutz: Oh really? Then why do I need you for? *slams door shut*
Monkeysarefunny: KA-POW. You sure showed him.
Isiah Zombie: Uhh, Donutz? Aren't you supposed to be in school right now? What class are you taking?
Admiral Donutz: I had today off, and I'm taking an algebra class... but if X equals lame, than that class is 4 times X.
Isiah Zombie: So aren't you supposed to be doing homework now?
Admiral Donutz: I can't do homework for medical reasons - it makes me sick.
Isiah Zombie: OMG! Quick! We need to get Donutz to the hospital now!
Monkeysarefunny: What is it?
Isiah Zombie: It's a big building with a lot of doctors in it, but that's not important now!
IZ, Monkey, and Donutz get into Monkey's Pimp-Mobile.
Monkeysarefunny: *starts up car* To the hospital!
Isiah Zombie: Umm... Monkey?
Monkeysarefunny: What?
Isiah Zombie: I just read your bumper sticker on the back and it says, "Honk if you love peace and quiet."
Monkeysarefunny: Yeah, so? Hold on to your hats! *VROOM!*
Meanwhile, at the hospital, before the trio arrives.
Dr. Bumtickle: Hmm.... I have yet to see a case of leprosy of this magnitude. Now you say someone imported chemical paint from Russia and slathered it on you while you were sleeping?
Leprosy Kid: Yes, but what is going to happen to me now, Doctor?
Dr. Bumtickle: I don't know, let's ask the kid in the lab.
Leprosy Kid: Huh?!
IZ, Monkey and Donutz burst in.
Isiah Zombie: Doctor! We need your help! My friend Donutz here gets sick whenever he does his homework!
Dr. Bumtickle: I'm currently busy with a patient, see?
Monkeysarefunny: OMG, not the leprosy kid.... *runs out*
Isiah Zombie: Monkey? What's the matter? *follows Monkey out the door*
Dr. Bumtickle: ...Are you the one I need to see?
Admiral Donutz: Who, me? Yes, Doctor.
Dr. Bumtickle: Well, Leprosy Kid, we're done here. Good day sir.
Leprosy Kid: Huh?! But I-
Dr. Bumtickle: I said GOOD DAY SIR!
Leprosy Kid: Phoo-ee... *walks out*
Dr. Bumtickle: So, you say you get sick whenever you do homework?
Admiral Donutz: Yeah...
Dr. Bumtickle: Do you like going to school?
Admiral Donutz: Yes, and I like going home too. It's the part in the middle I can't stand.
Dr. Bumtickle: Well being a very skilled and trained doctor, I can tell you that you're in good hands.
Admiral Donutz: -Hey wait, I recognize you! You're that doctor who dropped a baby outside a window last week!
Dr. Bumtickle: It's not MY FAULT that kids have NO HIPS!
*Nurse walks in*
Dr. Bumtickle: ...Er-herm, excuse me nurse, how is that little girl doing who swallowed ten quarters last night?
Nurse: No change yet.
Dr. Bumtickle: Ah, keep an eye on her.
Nurse: I'm here to tell you that there's an invisible man in the waiting room here to see you.
Dr. Bumtickle: Tell him I can't see him now. Next!
Admiral Donutz: Hey! What about me?
Dr. Bumtickle: Ah yes, I've forgotten, what is your name?
Admiral Donutz: Donutz.
Dr. Bumtickle: Alright Donutz, pull down your pants, bend over and say "Ahhhh."
Admiral Donutz: What?
Dr. Bumtickle: They don't call me Dr. Bumtickle for nothing
Meanwhile, outside the Doctor's office.
Isiah Zombie: Why'd you run out of there like that?
Monkeysarefunny: Because of that leprosy kid... he's in there because of me.
Isiah Zombie: Wait, you gave that kid leprosy?
Monkeysarefunny: Yes, that's why I ran out of the Doctor's office, I didn't want him to see me again - oh SNAP! Here he comes again! Quick! Into this other door!
*IZ and Monkey run into another room.... which happens to be a Psychiatrist’s office*
Doctor Bong: Are you two here for the 11:00 appointment?
Isiah Zombie: Umm no, we just-
Monkeysarefunny: Yes, yes we are!
Isiah Zombie: ...?
Monkeysarefunny: Play along for a little while, that leprosy kid is still out there...
Isiah Zombie: Y-Yes... sir, we are here for this appointment.
Doctor Bong: Well you take a seat right over there. I'm Doctor Bong, the psychiatrist, and you two are?
Monkeysarefunny: I'm Monkey, and this here is Isiah Zombie, my admin. He made me a mod
Doctor Bong: Ah yes, the relationship between an admin and a mod is very special, it's the same as the relationship between a husband and wife.
Isiah Zombie: Huh?! What? They're not the same at all.
Doctor Bong: You must care for your mod, you must fulfill his needs, urges, and desires-
Isiah Zombie:
Doctor Bong: -and I'm not just talking about the physical act of...
Isiah Zombie: Alright man! That is enough! No more needs and desires, and Monkey you are NOT to be fulfilled
Monkeysarefunny:
Meanwhile, inside the Doctor's office.
Dr. Bumtickle: Well Donutz, after the examinations, I have come to the conclusion that your tonsils have to come out.
Admiral Donutz: I want to have a second opinion.
Dr. Bumtickle: Okay, you're ugly too.
Admiral Donutz: ...
Dr. Bumtickle: Now try these pills to reduce pain *hands pills to Donutz*
Admiral Donutz: Alright... *consumes pills*
Dr. Bumtickle: Let me ingest some as well *consumes pills* Ahhh... that feels good... it is like they are gently coating my stomach like little marshmellows. How about you?
Admiral Donutz: To be honest? They're a couple Halloweens past their prime.
Dr. Bumtickle: Yes, I made them myself. Makes me feel like a rocket surgeon... now let me do one more test on you before you leave... *slaps Donutz*
Admiral Donutz: Augh!
Dr. Bumtickle: If you were to do that to yourself, would it hurt just as much?
Admiral Donutz: Yes
Dr. Bumtickle: Well then don't do that.
Meanwhile, inside the Psychiatrist’s office.
*One hour later...*
Monkeysarefunny: So you see, Doctor Bong, I've always been doing pranks for as long as I can remember.
Doctor Bong: But how did the pranks all start for you?
Monkeysarefunny: Let's see.... oh I remember! I once ripped off the head of my G.I. Joe doll and I put it on the top of a ketchup bottle... and made the head bleed through the ears.
Doctor Bong: Hmm... I see. Isiah Zombie, what do you think about that?
Isiah Zombie: *wakes up* Uhh... wha? Yes, I also did that too as well.
Doctor Bong: You don't seem to care for the feelings of Monkey, why is that?
Isiah Zombie: ...Because he tends to screw up and fail a lot.
Monkeysarefunny: But I locked the doors when we left. Do you still think I'm a failure?
Isiah Zombie: Not as much now, no.
Doctor Bong: I think I'm going to schedule another appointment for you too.
Monkeysarefunny:
Isiah Zombie: Umm, Doctor Bong? I don't think that will be necessary.
Doctor Bong: Oh it will happen. You have shown symptoms of "Moderater's Neglect," a very serious problem occurring in America. What will you possibly do to avoid the next appointment?
Isiah Zombie: Whatever it takes, for as long as it takes me, wherever it takes me, as long as it takes you away from me! *stands up* Come on Monkey.
Doctor Bong: Where do you think you're going? There's still 10 minutes remaining in our session!
Isiah Zombie: I think I have someone to fulfill.
Monkeysarefunny:
Doctor Bong: ...
*IZ and Monkey walk out*
Isiah Zombie: Wow, that Doctor Bong was getting very personal.
Monkeysarefunny: So... when are you going to fulfill me?
Isiah Zombie: What? Shut-it-uppy.
Monkeysarefunny: *Le Gasp!* You lied to me!
Isiah Zombie: ...Just a little.
Monkeysarefunny: *El Gaspo!* How could you?
Isiah Zombie: Stop gasping, will ya? ...We need to go find Donutz.
*IZ and Monkey walk into Doctor Bumtickle's office*
Isiah Zombie: ....Hey, where's the doctor?
Admiral Donutz: He's in the back prescribing me pills based on my X-rays. I have to take my tonsils out in case I get the flu.
Monkeysarefunny: That's.... that's good.
Isiah Zombie: Is it really?
Admiral Donutz: No-yes.... so where have you two been this whole time?
Monkeysarefunny: We were examined by Doctor Bong. IZ was diagnosed with Moderator's Neglect *does dance*
Admiral Donutz: Who the **** is Doctor Bong?
Monkeysarefunny: He's a bong... and a doctor.
Isiah Zombie: So now what?
*Admiral Donutz cell phone rings*
Admiral Donutz: (to phone)......Hello?
SPAM: Would you be willing to re-finance your house today?!
Admiral Donutz: I'm busy right now, could you call me back later?
SPAM: Sell your house today!!
Admiral Donutz: Could you give me your phone number so I can call you back?
SPAM: N-No?
Admiral Donutz: Oh is it because you don't want people calling you on your cell phone?
SPAM: Y-Yes?
Admiral Donutz: Well now you KNOW how I FEEL *hangs up*
Monkeysarefunny: KA-POW. You sure showed him.
Isiah Zombie: Why do you have a lot of spam following you?
Admiral Donutz: I don't know, they started popping up ever since I started to train with Steven in the Prince Bar.
Isiah Zombie: You're working at the Prince Bar?
Admiral Donutz: He's training me as a partner
*Dr. Bumtickle walks back in*
Dr. Bumtickle: Our high tech labs that I tested the X-Rays on show that we do not need to remove your tonsils after all.
Isiah Zombie: Wait... a high tech machine screwed up? How is that even possible? What makes it high tech then?
Dr. Bumtickle: It's cordless.
Monkeysarefunny: Ah.
Dr. Bumtickle: I'm afraid you're not quite as sick as I'd hope you'd be, Donutz.
Admiral Donutz: ....Yay!